Do More With Less - Stash Busting 2018

How does this keep happening?

There are layers to this madness. Also, the rest of it is in my room.

Looking at this basket full of...well, stuff, I sigh.

My body feels heavy. 

Why do I keep hoarding? 

I find it so easy to tell myself that I'm actually quite minimalistic compared to some people but I know that the only area of my life that I'm truly pleased with how much (little?) I have is my skin care routine. I half want to push it all into a cupboard for another year, shoving my hand in intermittently for whatever single product I desire (ignoring all others!) and then rinse and repeat for the new year 2019.

Naaah. I can feel that this year is a going to be a year of letting go.

And jeez, isn't that a scary thought? To let go? To release? It's almost easier to stay in the spaces we've set out for ourselves than to explore the frightening liberation of a huge world without the weight. To stay buried under all the things I persuaded myself I needed in order to succeed at my hair goals and thus at life.

This year, I want to get down to mid back length (I'm about an inch or two away from my back bra strap). Having this hoard is definitely not going to help me get there. Lemme strip back and find what works for me, rather than trying to (unsuccessfully) emulate the success of others.

I'm still going to try and I AM going to be more mindful about my hair care. No more rush job on a Sunday because I think I should. I want to do less in general, so that I have the time to really experience the little I will be doing.

So rather than: 'wash deep condition strengthen condition stretch moisturise wait to dry style for twenty years go go go'...I want to just do one at a time and do it well. Does that make sense? I feel really wishy washy here and vague with my ramblings, but I know what I mean in my belly. I can feel the fire starting to crackle there for the fighting and struggling and fear and anxiety coming this year and I'm determined to face it without the weight of somebody else's armour.

The plan  hope/desire hair-wise for this year:

• Keep using henna.
• Moisturise regularly using my herb teas.
• Decide what products I like and will actually use (I'm a sucker for a good smell or a natural hair fad). I am currently building a spreadsheet and dear God, it is a behemoth of a thing. I know I'll be grateful when it's done but right now, it feels like extreme self-flagellation by Excel 😂
• Get rid of products I'm ambivalent about [including through this blog and instagram]. 
• Keep my needs and routines simple. 
• Connect with people, not 'brands', on Instagram. (You know what I mean. Can't have a conversation with an actual person, just getting media snippets and regurgitated niceties. If I don't know where their general interests lay...well, no ma'am, no ham, no thank you.)

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Sick

Say hello to my little friends.

All 3 (million) of them at this point maybe..

Nobody likes getting sick.

But when getting sick once means that it will be a snowball of different treatments, side effects and compounding illnesses, it feels like a real pain in the butt.

I've been sick since October. An infection that should have gone away, but didn't. My doctor recommended a treatment that I prayed and thought would work.

It didn't.

I spent Christmas and New Year sizzling in my skin.

The second (different) doctor recommended antibiotics. By now, the infection was ravaging my body and making it hard to function, so I had no choice.
But my heart sank a little. My immune system is pretty poor anyway, but adding antibiotics into the mix would blast away any happy bacteria I had left in my overheated, little overwrought body.

I'm finishing up the course now, with the effects of the infection still present, the symptoms of a virus erupting in my weakened state and my gut having given up the ghost after all this abuse.

I've been reading a lot of information that seems to imply that the health of your gut can have a huge impact on your health in general.
I said in my previous challenge post that I was looking at fermented foods. In this article, Curly Nikki mentioned the effect poor gut and digestive health may have on the hair - and to me, it makes sense. What is the point of taking lots of supplements, if your body can't/won't make use of it by absorbing it properly?

I said I was going to try and help heal my gut by eating more fermented foods.
So far I've got two jars of kimchi in my fridge (one pictured above - it was full at the beginning of this week), in order to help replenish my lost army sacrificed in the terrible battle against evil usurping bacteria any probiotics.
I'm making fruity gelatin once a week to feed these probiotics in my gut till I've used up all my little packets.
I'm bone broth(isn't it basically stock?)-ing my way through this (now) freezing winter, to help feed up and fix my gut too. (I'd been looking at it anyway, but in relation to my teeth).
I've got some fermented ginger and turmeric on the way too, just because you can never have too many good bacteria.

Fighting the good fight! Hoo-ha!

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Resolutions - loading...

Self -care is hard.
The amount of time it takes to look after yourself seems preposterous:
I have to spend how long in the shower?
How many exactly of my teeth do I have to brush?
Breakfast too?
And I hafta do this every day??

I...can't take this!

There's definitely a scale of self-care time and different people feel comfortable at different points along this imaginary scale. For example, teenage me thought doing her feet once a week was a luxurious necessity. Now, I don't even want to talk about it.

Starting to care for myself was easy - so easy.

Keeping it up, in order to make it a lifelong habit was hard - so. dang. hard! I ran out of bamboo tea and then spent a ridiculous amount of time thinking about whether I should repurchase enough
I ran out of Vitamin D and somehow talked myself into thinking that it was too expensive, too much of a bother, well the days will start getting longer now so I shouldn't repurchase and should just wait it out.
I started second guessing my commitment to look after myself.

I started spending my weekends looking after other people instead of making sure I had enough vegetables in the house to give me the vitamins and minerals I needed.

There was, for me, a huge difference between purposeful resting and not having the energy to do anything. I did a lot of one, whilst telling myself it was the other, but the proof was in the pudding - in the apathy I started to feel towards many areas of life. I love food and cooking but eating pizza for dinner twice and breakfast?

Looking at my original self-care post, I expected to be hugely disappointed. But actually, the things I'd said were part of my personal philosophy, so I've made a start:

Cleansing my face once everyday - I don't want to talk about it. But no wonder my hyperpigmentation is still rife and a big part of my life.

Experience based treats - check! Kinda...I've been doing well on the crafting front, lame-o on the relaxing and pampering front. Balance, yo.

Eco-friendly teeth cleaning options - I've been thinking about this for ages. At the moment, I'm using Lush's Atomic Tooth Powder to clean my teeth.
I still have a plastic toothbrush because I had to buy one in an an emergency and there aren't any options around me I like. Still looking into reliable chewing sticks.

Give myself enough time to make what I need - I've done really, really well on this body moisturiser wise. Now to do the same hair- and health-wise!

Simplifying my stuff:

Getting rid of stuff I don't need - Minimalism has been on my mind for a while, so that's done a great job of spurring me on into giving away clothes, accessories and gifts that were inappropriate for me but could be great for someone else.
The one thing stopping me from going full hog is how much I dislike actual shopping on the high street. Clearly not designed for me, clearly a waste of time. And I'm the slowest seamstress in the world, so handmade clothing takes a while to appear...

Using up my craft stash - Again, slowest seamstress/knitter in the world. It's taking me a while. Lots of projects, loads of ideas - short on time. August was ambitious as heck. Plus...I bought more fabric this year. Can I say by 2020?
Buuut...in my defence, the fabric I have been buying has been very purposeful.
I made a baby blanket (quilt since I added wadding?) in a couple of days flat, I'm working on a skirt, and I have big plans for the red fleece in my cupboard.
I can't even be mad at myself over this one, haha!

Stop making excuses for not using things that work - Ahhh, trying to break the habit of a lifetime! I spoke about that (and some lame excuses I make) here. Great at the start - but I never seem to finish. I'm working on it!

Looking at that list and helps me to realise how great the little changes I have actually made make me feel.
 Like millions of other people all around the Western world, I'm back on the wagon with a vengeance. I'll be working to change from red and orange to green lights. Sometime. Eventually.
But it's ongoing, isn't it?

Self-care is so, so, so very hard. But so very worth it.

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No Hair Blogs? No problem!

To be honest and straight to the point, I haven't found it overly difficult not going on hair sites. Once I broke the habit of typing in certain sites and found other things to interest me, it was easy. My issues with my hair and comparing them - well, I have very little to compare them to, so I've just stopped comparing it. I don't think hair obsession is that serious or that bad - it's not affecting my health or my lifestyle, so I'm good. I just needed to get a little bit of perspective!

My hair related routine has become oh-so-simple - in fact, some weeks, it borders on neglect because I forget to do anything! I haven't been using Apple Cider Vinegar, or Black Tea when doing my hair because...I forgot? I'm lazy? It seemed like far too much effort and not really important?

I do need to use up all the tea in my house somehow but...I live in England. I'll find a way, haha!

 That way will probably consist of inviting over friends on a weekly basis:
"Would you like a cuppa?" "Ooh, yes, I'd love one!"

I think the hardest part has been the lack of community. Reading articles and comments from real people really makes you feel like you're a part of a community - maybe when it's agreeing or debating thrifty methods, hair products or even people. You feel a togetherness.

But there's definitely a different between reading and joining in and being part of a conversation. I think forums are much better at the conversation thing and I've come away from that. I miss commenting on the pages of new-er bloggers, or ones with a smaller audience, where it feels like you're having a lovely chat with a friend who just happens to live thousands of miles away from you.

On a similar note, The Littlest Sis is bugging me to go to a hair event sometime this summer, which will be intriguing and terrifying in equal measures. I have no idea what it's like! It seems really exciting and intimidating at the same time! What is it like to be at one? I feel I need to read reviews....

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Health > Obsession

Until I get to that particular weight, I won't be happy. She's at that weight and she's gorgeous. They're all so pretty...I wish I had the same weight as them. I don't think I can feel completely happy until I lose weight. I need to lose these pounds! My cousin knows a lady who can give me some pills to shed these pounds in a month! They're only available in Europe/the US but I need them. Apparently, sometimes you get some side effects too, but I'm willing to risk that to lose weight! They're mega expensive - how can I afford them? 

Those thoughts above don't sound like the healthiest mindset and it's because it's not - that person has obviously prioritised weight loss in front of their health - both mental and physical. Fortunately, I am nowhere near that mindset...at least, when it comes to my body. (It's pretty awesome, thank you for asking).

Replace 'weight' with 'hair length'. Swap 'shed these pounds' to 'gain those inches'. 'Lose weight' with 'grow my hair'. You can replace pills with hair products or keep it the same, it's similar.

And then suddenly, it is me.

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Our Favourite Blogger(s)

Now that we're married, The Wonder Thing is continually exposed to my (slightly obsessive) youtube watching habits.

Being as that none of them benefit him directly, he fails to see the appeal in watching and reading other people's work. Especially when I don't comment on them.

But the other day his sister sent him a video that, for those up to date in the natural world, is kind of old. It's the one of the guy doing his wife's hair.  The Wonder Thing loved it and now he's always bugging me to watch their videos together, instead of watching yet another hair video. He was fascinated by Ty's revelations on raising bi-racial children, stunned by his weight loss and amused by his antics with his children....basically, I think he wants to be best friends with Ty ;)

Well, at least he gets the appeal now.

I can't post any of the videos, since embedding is disabled, but I can definitely leave you with this screenshot:

I would definitely check that hair video out, at the very least! 

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CG Girl Gone Cone

It started innocently enough, in Paris. Borrowing a little bit of my house mates anti dandruff shampoo to clarify my scalp properly.

And then it spiralled - aggravated by a crazy life situation, an overwhelming need for convenience and no longer having the time, space and access to ingredients like before.

So here, we have my new list of products I'm using at the moment - at least, until life settles down a little bit more and allows me to get my clay on like I used to.

In the shower:

L - R: Schwarzkopf Gliss Hair Repair Ultimate Colour 
Shampoo with Liquid Keratin, Herbal Essences Hello Hydration.
I do have 5 fingers, I promise.

Name: Schwarzkopf Gliss Hair Repair with Liquid Keratin Ultimate Colour Shampoo .
Cost: £1
Use: Shampoo on a weekly basis


Name: Herbal Essences Hello Hydration.
Cost: £1.97 on offer, normally £3.89 at Boots.
Use: Conditioner after shampoo weekly; As a deep conditioner with an oil added.

Out the shower:

L - R: Cantu Shea Butter Leave In Conditioning Repair Cream, Rose Water, Eco Styler Olive Oil Gel, Macadamia Healing Oil Treatment.

Name: Cantu Shea Butter Leave In Conditioning Repair Cream

Cost: Free for me, from a stash of a relative, but around £4 from Beauty Shops.

Use: As a moisturiser in the colder days, and when I'm too lazy to condition wash my hair; as a styler for my twists. It was there and it meant I wouldn't have to lug a spritz bottle and a bottle of sealant in all at the same time.

Name:  Macadamia Healing Oil Treatment

Cost: £11 from TK Maxx - the pump was missing and half of the stuff had been poured out, so it was on reduction to £18. I pointed out to the till girl that, if half was missing, shouldn't it have half off...?
She agreed - success!

Use: As a sealant, hair serum, and a hair perfume.

I'm having a lot of fun experimenting with products on my hair and I still have one purchase left to make. It's been nice, as well, getting to give some of the products that the natural forums and community have been buzzing about a bit of a go as well :)

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I Can't Do Big Hair

I did a braid/plait out this weekend, using tap water and some hair oil.

Unlike when I do twistouts, I didn't immediately hate it. Having had to twirl the ends meant that they weren't as scraggly as when I do a twistout, and blended in well the tighter curl style.

But I still found myself pulling the top half up into a ponytail and only leaving the bottom part.
I've always said I have a problem wearing sets in my hair just as they are.

And this weekend, I worked out a few reasons why (SPOILER: it basically boils down to vanity):

1. The  idea that big hair suits everyone who has the potential to achieve it is a myth. When my hair is at it's most voluminous, I look ridiculous.

2. I get mushroom hair. This is mainly due to the shape [or lack thereof] of my my hair.As soon as any soon of fluffing occurs, the top half billows out and lo and behold, thus appears my resemblance to your average supermarket portobello.

3. I don't have the personality to wear big hair. Not to say I have no confidence - I'm confident in who I am. And I am someone who like hiding behind her hair, not having it draw attention to her.
No, seriously, I really don't like people looking at me because of my appearance. It makes me very uncomfortable - eek! It's just not my style (though as I write this, I'm wearing a yellow top with a pink and purple printed skirt. And I'm happy with it).

4. It acts as a sort of homing beacon for fluff and other stuff whenever my hair is out and being loud, which will necessitate a wash day sooner than expected.
Which makes me feel like it's a waste of time.

This isn't to say I hate big hair completely - I think it's fun and at times, it's a massive relief. But it's not my go-to way of referring to my hair and I don't think I'm particularly bothered about the pursuit for volume. That's never really been a problem - it's just not very flattering on me at the moment.
I guess I'm definitely definition over volume then [like this gorgeous picture of Alice from Alice in Nappyland.

However, it seems that in every blog post I read or vlog I watch, big hair is touted as the ultimate destination, making me feel as though the fact I think smaller hair suits me should be a dirty secret...like using hair grease.

Maybe it is just me?

But I guess that's okay. I'm not doing all this to my hair to simply get caught up in someone else's rules.

Heck, this is going to be my new passport picture! :)

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There's more to Student Finance than the Debt.

As an antidote to my lack of hair blogs, I've taken up reading personal finance blogs instead (out of the frying pan...). I've found a plethora of good ones based in the UK, but there are quite a few based in North America too. One thing I noticed was that few - okay, none of the British blogs were written by students or for students.

Which is incredible, considering how much debt students are going to get themselves into, isn't it? The closest thing I found was this series by the Guardian,written by an anonymous student at Warwick University.

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Last year, I gave up meat for Lent.

Well, not really gave up. I decided to look at it less from what I was not getting and more as a glance at that which I had left to totally and completely embrace.

This year, I've not been so easy on myself.

I've given up hair blogs *passes out*

Even typing the words makes my insides crawl at the thought of it.

Partly, it's to cut down on my electricity and laptop usage. I will quite happily spend at least 5 hours every day on my laptop simply clicking through to random blogs and watching people (the amount of hours I spent watching people on Youtube has in no way transferred to my styling skills in real life. Ergo, twas a waste of time).
And secondly, it's because I have a serious, serious addiction. The few days when I finally decided has been incredibly difficult. Two of the most visited  pages on my google chrome new tab thingy are hair blogs (mainly hairscapades, due to a combination of regular updating and brilliant, engaging content). My shy, private nature has become much worse in the last couple of weeks and being in real social situations has started to seriously stress me out (yes, it's that bad).

The rules are simple: Absolutely no hair blogs (unless a post comes up in my reader that is apparently non hair related - which kind of nullifies the absolute part of this rule) and no using the laptop between 8am - 12pm. I'm still allowed to update here though, because if not the back log of thoughts will build up in my head and drive me mad.

Hopefully, this will give me enough time to start back up and improve on my atrocious sewing skills....

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The myth of the Stupid Question

It was a semi balmy day and my siblings and I were stretched out in the living room, too satisfied with our current positions to even consider moving. Suddenly, the Rebel Sis perked up, looked me straight in the eye and asked:

"Hey. What's the Holocaust?" 

For a second, I stared back incredulously - was she serious? Was she genuinely asking me this question?

But just then, I remembered - she'd spent two years of her schooling in Nigeria during when thy would have taught the Holocaust at school in England. Although I wasn't incredibly sure, I doubted that the Holocaust was a huge part of the Nigerian curriculum. Upon realising this genuine reason for her not knowing, there was also a part of me that was chuffed that she'd thought to ask me to enlighten her upon this topic.

On the flip side, when my mum and I were in the kitchen prepping food, whilst peeling the obligatory onions and garlic, I looked at my mum and asked, "Mum, does garlic grow on trees?" My mum had grown up on a farm and so threw her head back and started laughing at that simple question that seemed plain ridiculous to her. When she had finished displaying her mirth, she opened her her eyes to see my patient fifteen year old self waiting for a response. I had grown up in London, and never grown anything of my own because we bought everything from the supermarket, so how was I to know?

Thus it drives me nuts when questions are labelled 'stupid'. It shows a massive assumption on someone's part that certain types of knowledge are universal and prevents people who don't know from learning. because they're afraid of being painted as stupid as their question would be seen to be. 

I don't know if I believe in stupid questions. But I know I think that childlike questions definitely exist - questions innocently asked to someone they trust has more knowledge in that area than themselves; questions that they genuinely would like the answer to; questions that show a gap in knowledge that they long to have filled.

Basically, it means they trust you more than they trust Google.

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Children's Christmas

I hope everyone reading this has a lovely, Merry Christmas and happy holiday time.

I'll just leave you with this sweet interpretation of Christmas while you enjoy your festive time.

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Philosophy

If I purposely don't wear a hat when it rains, does this still count as moisturising my hair?

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Epiphany Break

This post is a bit of a long one - apparently, when it comes to my relationship with my hair, I'm quite the philosopher. Chew on that Socrates!

After I did my Cassia treatment and saw all the broken hairs in the bottom of my shower, I was miffed. I thought that the Cassia hadn't worked properly, that I needed more protein my products, that my hair was incredibly weak. It's usually at moments like this that I consider shaving all of my hair off, as doing so will spite my hair into doing what I want, but I know I'd regret it (though wouldn't it be awesome to graduate with a shaven head?).


Basically, I blamed everyone but myself as I asked "Why is my hair breaking?"


And then I remembered this post.


Truth be told, it was almost definitely breaking because of me. Usually, my breakage consists of long strands with no white bulbs, but this time, after handling my hair far in far too rough a manner; after the shrinkage and tangling I'd experienced from the Doomed Twistout; after using a new comb on my sopping wet and weak hair to make detangling easier, when I know my hair is too fine for me to use brushes and combs on it...well, there were a lot of those dreaded short curly bits on the floor.


Then I actually took a look at my hair and was like "Whoa. Why am I so upset?" The fact is, despite all the 'problems' I keep finding with my hair, I love it. At the moment, it's probably the best looked after it's ever been in my entire life. Even when I'm mad about breakage, I love the way it feels when it's wet, when it's dry, when it's twisted or when it's fluffy.


Hold up. Freud insight moment!

*breaks it down on her chaise lounge*

I've been so focused on getting to Waist Length and proving my mum wrong, I'd forgotten what I'd first thought when I'd stopped relaxing - that I wanted to enjoy my hair.


I was still bitter over the hair that got cut and kept thinking, if it hadn't gotten cut, I would be down to here by now... Which is stupid, because being bitter over it isn't going to make the hair miraculously grow back like it never left.


Obsessed with preserving my hair, I'd continuously been watching Youtube videos and reading blog posts and advice and wondering what I was doing wrong, whilst ignoring the most important piece of advice they'd all given:

Leave your hair alone and treat it extremely delicately.

And then prepare for the fact that, even after looking after it incredibly well, hair will still break eventually, because nothing lasts for ever.


My hair is not perfect, but neither am I. And there's a funny sort of liberation that comes from realising that your very idea of perfection is flawed - whether its to do with hair, or appearance or intelligence and talents.


I'll get to Waist Length, but there's no rush, except on my part. People can do it in two years, but I'm not prepared to put my hair away for 2 years in order to do that. I want to enjoy it!  If I set myself a certain goal of achieving it, it'd more than likely be a measurement a year, because I'm taking it nice and slow now.


Armpit Length by the end of 2011, Bra Strap Length by the end of 2012, Mid Back Length by the end of 2013 and Waist Length by 2014.


Totally doable.


And even if takes me five years, or even ten, but I will get there eventually, but at my own pace.

But I really need to stop obsessing over my hair. Which for me consists of no longer compulsively recounting the hair journeys of other people and comparing my progress against theirs, and always pulling my hair down to check how length I've gained in 2 hours and signing up to so many challenges, because I always fail or find myself lacking.

Gets helluva boring pretty quickly. My only hair challenge for this year is no more hair challenges.

No more limiting myself by rules that are focused on gaining length.

Remembering the art of patience and the fact that I do have a life outside of my hair (even if my blog does not seem to indicate this!).

After I finish Loo's 3in6 challenge, I guess I'm dropping out of Milan's challenge.

So in order to honour this promise to myself, my hair and I are on a break.

After having this incredible epiphany, I went ahead and put my hair into braids.

Tiny, tiny braids.

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Wedding Ahoy!

I'm not going to lie, I can't wait for the Royal Wedding.

Mainly because, once it's over and done with, people will hopefully stop talking about it.

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"No Such Thing as a Nigerian Vegetarian!"

Being pescetarian for 40 days was not incredibly difficult overall.

However, there were a few times when it got a bit sticky:


1. Eating out: 

Especially if it's a place you go regularly and order the same thing off every time. Having to re-assess a menu you haven't read in about 8 months is creepy.

It's even worse if the menu's limited. As someone who isn't fond of raw cheese (bleeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrghhhhhhh), when the vegetarian section consists of Cheese, Cheese and Pickle or Cheese and Mature Cheese sandwiches, I wasn't exactly spoilt for choice.

Thus meant I ended up eating chips a lot when I was in a rush and wanted something inexpensive, quick and meat free.

2. Eating socially:

Usually, every Friday night, Lady V, the Faerie and I get together at each other's houses, and let them wait on us hand and food.

And the Faerie really likes meat, but felt guilty about it even being in the kitchen with me, so it kind of felt like I was depriving them as well.

Though being in the student bubble meant I'd forgotten when Lent had started and I hadn't sorted out my shopping list/timetable properly, so ending up cooking a meal for them that I couldn't eat, because it had meatballs in it.

Apparently, it was delicious.

It's okay, I'm not bitter *sniff*

What-EVAH!

3. Coming home: 

Cooking for myself gives me a lot more freedom and ease when it comes to dodging meat and getting inventive in the kitchen, whilst still getting the protein and iron I needed from food.

But when I'm at home?

In a Nigerian home?

Dodging meat is near impossible.

Here's a conversation snippet from when I was fourteen:

Mum: Why aren't you eating any stew?

Me: It's got meat in it, Mummy.

Mum: So? What's wrong with meat?

Me: *In an appropriately dramatic manner* Mummy, I'm a vegetarian!

(Pregnant pause)
Mummy: There's no such thing as a Nigerian vegetarian. Hurry up, eat it quickly!

And then she sat there and made sure I ate it.

Even though I'd been vegetarian for nearly 6 months by then, that was the end of that.

Basically, apart from chicken, there's no other form of protein in my house (apart from baked beans, which isn't exactly the most nutritious of options with all the sugar and salt). As well as that, I think my blood iron levels are a bit low, because I've been feeling really tired since I've gotten home.

Plus my mum puts chicken stock in EVERYTHING. Lots of Nigerian dishes would actually be great vegetarian/vegan meals if there wasn't so much chicken stock in it.

So I've had to compromise - even though I wasn't eating any meat by-products either, to avoid starving to death, or eating too much pre-packaged food, or seriously offending my mum, I've been eating the jellof rice.

Even though I saw my mum put chicken stock in it.

Even though I pleaded with her not to.

Mum: If I don't put chicken stock in it, it won't have any flavour. It's not just you eating out of this pot, you know.
Think of your brother and sisters.

So I'm not sure if this Lent was a fail or not.

Also, the weather's been good, so everyone is my house is like "Fried Chicken! Barbequed chicken! Stewed chicken!"

With the smell permeating through the house on what feels like a continuous basis, I've been like this for the past two weeks:

But all in all, I've enjoyed the experience! I got some really good meals out of it (like an incredibly delicious fried mushroom quesadilla that the Wonder Thing whipped up for me - yum!) and I've learnt how to be more inventive. 

Another fact was that my meals became really vegetable orientated when I skipped out on meat, so I guess in a way they got healthier. 

I changed my way of cooking - there was less meat, and more baking and roasting and general usage of the oven, and things went a bit slower, so I planned it ahead.

Planning food ahead meant that I got really excited about it - and I generally get excited about food, but this was something else.

When you're in a seminar and suddenly remember you're making butternut squash soup for dinner that evening and start rubbing your hands together and squeaking in glee, earning you the concerned and wary glances from your classmate...well, if that's not excitement, I don't know what is. 

Well, maybe a little bit of greed, maybe. But it's excited greed, so it still counts.

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Being 'Not Weird'

Don't get too used to weekend posts, y'hear? I need them to catch up.

So this weekend, I went to two Yoruba weddings (on the same day! Dudettes, I was POOPED!) and thus came the massive topic of 'hair'. And what to do with mine.

To avoid any more arguments, and because I hadn't really made an effort since I expected to still be wearing the braids, I wore a scarf.

I was really mad at some things that had been said and it made me think about negative and positive things.

When you hang out with people who think the same way you do, you don't even think about how your mutual interests are odd. It's only when you go to 'the outside world' that you have to consider these things.

So I thought of five things we can do to prevent 'not-weird-people' from stopping us from doing things like knitting, growing a beard, being a gamer (and not just the Final Fantasy series) dancing in the street or having natural hair:

• If everybody else is doing what it is not-weird, then at the not-weird meetings, you will not get any cookies, because there's so many people. Eating up all the cookies.
  However, in the weird/kooky/freaks/oddity group, there are less of us. So that's less people eating cookies. Therefore, MORE COOKIES FOR US! Whooooo!
  
  
• I used to think there had to be a time limit on how long people had to act no-weird (don't judge me). But apparently, you must be not-weird 24/8 (even when you sleep!). I don't know about you, but I have a very short attention span.
  
  So that just wouldn't roll. You get me?
  
• Being not-weird must get very tiring - the list of things that are weird seems to grow everyday and change depending on your circumstances. Like, what may be appropriate for a 19 year old may not be appropriate when you hit 21, or 60 and vice-versa (thrice?).

Either this helped you or it didn't (I'm betting on the latter). But it's so easy to let other people's opinions change the way you see yourself.

Look at yourself as a whole, because it's the whole that makes you unique.

One of Gandhi's fundamentals was "Nobody can hurt me without my permission."

The way you react to somebody's actions towards you is your own choice. You can decide to flip out over people finger wagging over what you do, or you can laugh or walk away.

That's not to mean it might not hurt. I mean, we're human. But you can choose how far you let that hurt take you. Do you storm off, kicking tables and chairs over, screaming at the top of your voice about vengeance, wrath and raining fire and brimstone?

Whaddaya mean yes?? *backs away from you*

Eleanor Roosevelt said "You can never really live anyone else's life, not even your child's. The influence you exert is through your own life, and what you've become yourself."

No-one else can force you to do someone thing. You can resist! It's your life!

My goodness. I feel a song coming on...:

Anyhoo... *re-arranges self* At the end of the day, when it comes down to it, you cannot blame somebody for the life you end up living. We are all responsible for our own actions, and our lives will never exactly mirror any body else's - so by all means, use them for inspiration, but trying to emulate people may wind up a fruitless venture.

Do you. If that involves copying people, fine. Because in the end, it's down to you.

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Why Take That were right.

So, this post has a moral.




And that moral...is patience.





If you are not patient, right after devouring a chunk of Banana Coconut Sweet Cake, you will decide to make pasta, because you are hungry (unfortunately, in my case, greed and impatience seem irrevocably intertwined).


If you are not patient, you will put the dry pasta into the pot on the highest heating to make sure the pot gets hot quickly.


If you are not patient, you will get bored after 0.0001 seconds, and then decide to boil the water in the kettle, because boiling water on the stove, with the pasta, would take too long.


If you are not patient, you will run back to read your manga online because you reeeeeeeeally want to know how Fruits Baskets ends and finding out after your pasta cooked is not an option.


No, really, it wasn't.


If you are not patient, half an hour later, you will smell smoke, run into your kitchen and start choking to death on the fumes from charred pasta.


That's right. Charred pasta.


If you are not patient, you will run outside with the pan and dump the pasta on the ground, then run back in while you open every single window in your house to try and get rid of the smell/fumes with a T-shirt wrapped around your mouth to minimize smoke inhalation (this is a really stupid thing to do. I would not advise it. Not even with adult supervision).


If you are not patient, whilst opening a window, you will realise that it is a windy day, and the charred pasta is now on fire.




Yes, I did indeed say on fire. Here's a picture for proof:

At this moment, hopefully, common sense kicks in and you get a glass of water and and pour it over and save yourself (and more importantly....the environment) from the smoke.


So, I hope you've all learnt something. Mull that over, while I sit here and celebrate narrowly avoiding becoming a Darwin award recipient.

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Movie Quote

On the plane home, I watched a Korean movie called 'Kill Me, Kiss Me' because I thought it was based on one of my favourite Korean manga books ever.

It wasn't.

Premise was a suicidal love-sick girl and an assassin who fall for each other.

I loved it.

And I loved this quote, as translated from the Korean:

"Love is the greatest energy that moves people"

How sweet is that? Stick that in your Christmas cards, Clinton!

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